Sunday, May 29, 2011

Kids Are Dumbasses, Too

Since we're all missing Bruce during his hiatus, I thought I would put up his guest post next. For those who don't know, Bruce has four blogs that he writes. Four. Fucking. Blogs. Man. I'm still trying to keep up with my measly two and I'm not going through half the bullshit he is. Hang in there, Bruce. We love you and we're all pulling for you.

I try to encourage everyone who guest posts to embrace their inner 'fuck.' People tend to look at you funny or gasp in horror when an F-bomb is dropped, so, of course, I try to drop them every chance I get. Bruce, however, is no stranger to 'fuck.'  And since you read my blog on a regular basis, neither are you.

How about a little Evil Twin to go with your hot dog and potato salad? Join Bruce and I as we 'fuck' our way through the holiday weekend.




You people are such perverts.




hiya-


i am evilbruce the evil twin of JADIP bruce
for those that do not know me, i use the word fuck.
alot.
and rant.
alot.
about what ever pisses me off.
but.
like i always say....


sooner or later i will piss you off... 
consider this an apology in advance. 


no. 
fuck that. 


get over it! 


i offer no apologies.
none.
this is my rant.
i will rant and you will listen...


or go here.




oh and thank you to the most wonderful Mrs. Hyde for allowing me to come over here and fuck with your chi...whatthefuckever


on to the rant!


i was wandering up and down the street the other day.


you know, in a car.


well, actually my truck.


just. wasting. fuel.


driving.


cuz i am 'merican!


fucking driving.


(the kids to the bus stop.
ya know 5 feet down the street.
in everytown USA.)


and thinking.


a lot.


a.fuck.of.a.lot!


shit that people are looking for and find my fucked up site, cuz they were looking for it these fucktards and i am making fun of them...
1. porn (why does porn not trend more?)
2. stupid celebridicks (like the one that i do not mention)
3. stupid celebrichicks (like the one that i do not mention)
4. fuel prices, mortgage rates, and apple pie (well, not so fucking much on the apple pie)
5. some celebridick or celebrichick is (getting married, divorced, breaking up)
6. famous person (dies)
7. some disaster (happen everyday)
8. sports dingus (some overpaid athlete says/does some fucked up shit)
9. health shit (there is always some new miracle drug...i prefer pot)
10. wild card (some days something really new and different happens...not fuckin likely)


what to write for Mrs Hyde?
could i write about the insurance and pharmaceutical clusterfuck and the reason that healthcare has
skyrocketed?


oh simple, way to simple...greed.
no that will not do...


what about?


fucking fucktards that have pissed me off?


petulant little sniveling shits!


this includes my overly pampered snot nosed kids.


yes.
at times they have pissed me off.
to the point of killing them?
not quite.
not even close.
but they do piss me off.


this post is not about my kids.
i can tell them what it think about them to their faces.
but not when i am pissed.


nope.
i wait to calm down.
some times.
not always.
red hair.
a bit.


i am talking about the other peoples kids out there.


yep.
the kids in question?
the dumbass little shitdrippings that walk in front of your car as you are driving down the road and flip you off?


they piss me off...


yep.
but not as much as the whiney shitnosed little fucktards that think life is so unfair.


you know,
cuz they are driving a USED bmw...


i live in a well-to-do neighborhood...
we rent.
cuz the school system is good.
and cannot afford to buy and pay the taxes.
but that is another story for another day...
those taxes?
yes.
we still pay, in a way, by the inflated rent.


but these irritants are just that...irritants...
like gnats.


nope.
they are not my subjects today.


i am talking about the kids that run the fucked up bullshit we call...
the governmonster of the good old USofA.


wait? what?
they are not kids!
no?


then stop! the! fuck! acting! like someone's fuckedup little child.
take responsibility for the position you were fucking voted into!
stop pointing fingers like a petulant FUCKTARDED, BRAINDEADED child.
stop acting like the neighborhood bully!
stop fucking stealing from the poor and giving to the rich!
stop your incessant vitriol laden whinnyassed bullshit.


stop politics as usual 


stop doing what is in your best interest.


kids are selfish.
i understand that.
but they are kids.
that we mold.
into adulthood.
by teaching!


but no!
all you prostiticians!
stop being part of the fucktarded problem and become the fucking solution!


figures, tho.
these kids
they are all lawyers.
born from rich parents.
silverspoon and all in hand!


born to argue
and prove points.
and talk in circles.
to confuse.
and divide.
and conquer.


just like a couple little rich kids
trying to win mommy's and daddy's love.
and making the other sibling look bad.


fucking SHAME ON YOU!
all of you.
there is not one of you worthy of holding my jockstrap.
let alone the future of my kids.


grow the fuck up.
and do your job.
lead the fucking country!
stop the bickering like a couple fucktarded children.
mrs. red, mr. red
mr. blue, mrs. blue


red and blue together make purple.


i love being purple.


he said
she said
fuck you
bullshit!


fuck you and your dirty little fucking agendas
for the people that bankrolled your bankstarded fuckeroo into fuckity fuck land.
where you instantly forget the reason you are there.


to govern


of the people
for the people
and by the people...


not of the unions.
not for the corporations.
and by the big businesses


for the common good.
not the wealthy good
not the moneygod.


for us.


the people that pay your fucking salary
and give you life-time bennies.
and retirement.
and luxury.


while we lick the scraps of your pots
like a junkyard dog.









fuck you!



cuz you have fucked me for the last time.





fuck you!
and the whores you rode in with...
your fucking rich agenda bedfellows.


SHAME THE FUCK ON YOU!
children of a fucked up moneygod.
fuck you for all the reasons...
and more


the revolution is here.


who will stand with me?


till next time,
keep it stupid, simple


vote BET  in 2012!



11 comments:

  1. Holy fuck. Exactly.

    www.alotoflayers.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have missed Bruce and his evil twin!

    ReplyDelete
  3. A-funking-men Brother! Well said.
    Love to you both Mrs. Hyde and Bruce xo

    The Ranter’s Box

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  4. Dear Bruce,

    I love the word FUCK too. It makes me smile. Well that and the word CUNT. I like your humor and think I just might have to follow your fucking ass now like the stalker bitch that I am.

    Dear Mrs. Hyde,

    I made a blog post about you and your awesome page. I think you need to go look at it and let me know if it is up to your standards.


    picklesinmyass.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  5. Thank you Mrs. Hyde! I have been missing me some Bruce and as this was originally done while I was on my own hiatus I had not seen it.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Damn, I fuckin love me some BET and The awesome Sir Bruce. And I am missing my daily "fuckity fuck fuck" but I know what he is doing while away from Blogland is important and he will be back.

    Hugs to you both

    ReplyDelete
  7. That's my lil' brother! I'm so proud of him! He speaks his mind and it makes perfect sense! Thanks Mrs. Hyde for looking after him! Love you both!

    ReplyDelete
  8. thank you Mrs Hyde and all of you that liked my little rant...

    i will be back as soon as i can and attempt to fuckin fix the world, but for now, i am stuck in 3d trying to fix my world...

    btw 3d sucks.

    fucking sucks!~

    ReplyDelete
  9. this made me miss bruce more

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  10. @Bruce: Good mojo coming your way my friend.

    @Mrs. Hyde: Thank you so much for your kind words regarding my 1st blogoversary. I too am honored to have met and befriended you. xo

    The Ranter’s Box

    ReplyDelete
  11. I will stand with you, Bruce! Hand me the purple pill!

    ReplyDelete

Bitch with me, will you?